We come this week to the final portion in Numbers, a double portion Matot-Ma’aseh. It is a challenging portion as it deals with leadership issues in many ways.
We have a difficult and challenging section dealing with the war against the Midianites. We confront a moral issue in 31 when Moses confronts the commander who reports that they spared the women and children. The anger of Moses is the subject of much concern and comment. No doubt the those of you who will study Torah this Shabbat will spend some time on this passage.
But there is another section in this portion that speaks to issues that may be impacting many of us. In 32, the tribes of Reuben and Gad ask Moses to allow them to set up their camp outside the promised land. An interesting conversation takes place that touches on community, loyalty, and responsibility. In the end, Gad and Reuben are given the permission, and they promise to continue to be part of the community. They sought the validity of their own lifestyles.
Now, this little story can speak to us today. In many of our families, we have observed our children and grandchildren who have decided to make lifestyle choices that may differ from those that we have made, or that we may consider outside the norm. Yet, today, the concept of the “norm” has significantly changed. Gad and Reuben do not wish to separate themselves from the community, rather, they wish to live their lives in their own way as part of the community, to be accepted for their choices. There is a negotiation of sorts with Moses, just as there is within many of our families. Let me suggest that this little story can be seen as a pathway to discuss how families, out of love, can embrace and support lifestyle choices of loved ones that may differ from what we have chosen. Yet, remember, just like the portion, there is room for these choices within our community, a community that harkens back to the primary ethical and humane aspect of being in the image of the Divine. In a world and society that seeks to undermine so many of these choices, we would do well to remember Gad and Reuben.
Chazak Chazak V’nitchazek
Shabbat shalom
Rabbi Richard F Address
Rabbi Richard F. Address, D.Min, is the Founder and Director of www.jewishsacredaging.com. Rabbi Address served for over three decades on staff of the Union for Reform Judaism; first as a Regional Director and then, beginning in 1997, as Founder and Director of the URJ’s Department of Jewish Family Concerns and served as a specialist and consultant for the North American Reform Movement in the areas of family related programming. Rabbi Address was ordained from Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion in 1972 and began his rabbinic career in Los Angeles congregations. He also served as a part time rabbi for Beth Hillel in Carmel, NJ while regional director and, after his URJ tenure, served as senior rabbi of Congregation M’kor Shalom in Cherry Hill, NJ from 2011-2014.
In previous parashot, an aged and tired Moses, no longer at the top of his game, reacted to challenges by falling on his face (probably an idiomatic expression equivalent to the modern “threw up his hands”) and relied on God to sort things out, possibly with a plague. Here he takes control, listens to them, explains his needs, and both sides actually craft a win-win situation that everybody can live with. The tribes of Gad and Reuven will be at the vanguard of the Israelite forces in the conquest of Canaan, and only then will they settle in the lands east of the Jordan.