Making Peace with My Past

photo of man sitting on a cave
Photo by M Venter on

At age 80, should I reconnect physically with my past?
Hey, I’m endeavoring to live in the present so to thrive
Concerning core family and childhood friends far away,
Must I visit them to become more aware and alive?

What might I learn in seeing people and places from long ago?
I escaped to discover myself, with scant thought of looking back
Ah, but charged memories possess a potency all their own
Should I face them to discern if any salutary feelings I still lack?

For a long time, I pretty much ignored distant people and scenes
It was enough for me to phone or text the dear persons still living
Should I see them because of obligation, affection or curiosity?
Remembering I’ve received less energy than I had been giving.

After over a decade of being physically absent from past ties
Internal signals started me wondering about them in my head
Am I missing what’s precious where constancy meets change?
Am I overlooking genuine gold by thinking it’s merely lead?

Maybe my past people have grown like I believe I’ve done
Might past bonds evolve into deeper feelings in the now?
Is it worth my time and dollars to explore it face to face?
Am I expecting a whimper when what awaits me is a wow!?

Okay, enough of imagining what may or may not be real
For Thanksgiving 2023, I’ll explore this situation for 15 days
Sharing ample time and space, intimacy may well expand
I’ll be searching their eyes to see if our souls are more ablaze.

South Jersey, Philly and New York City are on my agenda
I scheduled the relatives and friends as in my timeframe fit
I enjoyed time with them all, while delighting in fine eating
I listened to them, refraining from dazzling them with my wit.

Because each person is different, each conversation was unique
We recalled the past, claimed the present, imagined us ahead
We embraced and illuminated each other in positive patterns
Minds open, hearts engaged, voices saying what could be said.

We spoke with ease and grace, with love and joy nicely flowing
Touching happy and sad topics, we renewed our karmic lease
I recommitted to the people with me on this physical plane still
Harmony with the past is how to become presently at peace.

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