Vayera (Genesis 18:1-22:24) Seeing The World Anew As We Grow

We are met this Shabbat with a wide variety of issues, emotions and tensions. It is in this portion that Abraham argues with God over the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrha. We examine a rather challenging story of Lot and his daughter’s and Lot’s wife. Then there is the banishment of Hagar and Ishmael and finally the epic story in chapter 22 of the so-called “binding of Isaac” or Akedah. The portion begins with a famous story of Abraham, recovering from his circumcision, being visited by three men/angels which forms the proof text for our tradition on the mitzvah of bikkur cholim: visiting the sick.
There is much to unpack in this portion on so many levels. No doubt your Torah study this week will be filled with ideas. Much of the portion has direct meaning for us. Take for example Genesis 18:2 and the repetition of the word used for “see”, va’yar. Think about us. When we are younger, we “see” things in one way, often taking things as they seem. Yet, given the perspective of age and life experience, now we often “see” things differently, perhaps, we hope, with more wisdom.
The intra-familial issues between Hagar, Sarah, Ishmael, Isaac and Abraham are being played out now in so many families. Yet, in reading through the stories again, I was struck by an interpretation on Genesis 22 from the late Rabbi Jonathan Sacks. (z’l). There are, as many of you know, a myriad of interpretations for this chapter. Sacks, in his “Essays on Ethics” looks at the imagery of Isaac being “bound” and sees in this the call to parents that we cannot continue to hold on to our children as they grow. Seeing our children as adults, as independent human beings is a transition for many of us. It is a need to “let go” and allow these adults to be free and, we hope, enter a new type of relationship with us. As Sacks writes: “What God was doing when He asked Abraham to offer up his son was not requesting a child sacrifice but something quite different. He wanted Abraham to renounce ownership of his son. He wanted to establish as a non-negotiable principle of Jewish law that children are not the property of their parents.”
One of the blessings of parenthood really is being able to “see” our children emerge and grow into different stages of life. Their independence can trigger some powerful feelings in us because as they grow and mature, we become more aware of time’s passage and our own aging. Yet, our tradition sees in those changing relationships the hope and possibility of new ways of being seen. That life cycle that we all are a part of becomes so much more powerful as we grow older and “see” so much in so many ways
Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Richard F Address

Rabbi Richard Address

Rabbi Richard F. Address, D.Min, is the Founder and Director of www.jewishsacredaging.com. Rabbi Address served for over three decades on staff of the Union for Reform Judaism; first as a Regional Director and then, beginning in 1997, as Founder and Director of the URJ’s Department of Jewish Family Concerns and served as a specialist and consultant for the North American Reform Movement in the areas of family related programming. Rabbi Address was ordained from Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion in 1972 and began his rabbinic career in Los Angeles congregations. He also served as a part time rabbi for Beth Hillel in Carmel, NJ while regional director and, after his URJ tenure, served as senior rabbi of Congregation M’kor Shalom in Cherry Hill, NJ from 2011-2014.